Toronto

My Quest For Closure:My Battle 🥊 With⏳ Time, PT 2 ⌚…..

~ dawnlovely ~ Leave a comment

It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon, the weather was close to perfect. I decided to hop on the streetcar and do a long walk, to a shop that I’d been meaning to go to pre-shutdown. I hadn’t visited this intersection in a year, and the last time I’d been round the corner I was a child. There was a restaurant that I wanted to go to, I was craving a bean burrito. I decided to walk down the people filled street, with restrictions lifted, it looked chaotic.

As I walked down the street, I was shocked at how busy it was! There were three times as many people, as the vacant street that I had walked down. There were pockets of homeless people, on both sides of the streets. I was taken aback, because I don’t remember this street being this way. My first instinct was to turn right back around and hop on the first bus back towards home. I felt overwhelmed, for a few seconds, very uneasy, uncomfortable, and I wasn’t sure why. I took a breath, and shook it off. I realized that I was allowing myself to let fear take over me. I was afraid to face the confusion of my childhood trauma, the feeling unsettled from constantly moving around. The places I had faint but yet strangely familiar memories of, walking with my Mother and all of us kids. I had no reason to let fear guide me now, and I wanted to see this strangely familiar street. This street resonated with my soul, as many streets in Toronto do. I decided to continue walking, and walk strong, as my mother always said to me.

I started to feel a sense of nostalgia, as I approached the local Toronto public library. I immediately wanted to pull out my phone to take a pic, but somebody was sitting on the grass in front, taking selfies. I didn’t want to disturb them, by pointing my phone towards them, as that may make them uncomfortable. I try to exercise good phone photo etiquette while in public, so I decided not to take the pic. I told myself that while the weather is good, I will be sure to return and take a photo.

As I waited for my food at a chill classic authentic Mexican restaurant, I felt a sense of relief. I was happy that I continued walking and exploring the block. I felt a sense of pride, and closure. I walked to the bus stop with the heaviest burrito I had ever bought in my life, and headed home.

Take Care, Stay safe, and Stay tuned.

~ Dawn Lovely

Follow me@:https://twitter.com/iamdawnlovely, https://t.co/wfctLWHJ1W

Just Some Thoughts 🤔:Our New Norm 🚉🚌 ….

~ dawnlovely ~ Leave a comment

The new norm has been bittersweet for me from the start, but it’s come with many blessings in disguise. For one, I was able to take a break from long commutes to work, and work from home again. I was over and done with commuting in packed subway stations. I was relieved, and ecstatic about the government enforced “social distancing” rule applied to the GTA transit system. It was the perfect rule to enforce, for many reasons. For one, some subway stations are over crowded to a point where it’s not safe, when walking through. Secondly, when buses are over crowded, drivers continue taking more people in, or they drive right past you. You may be waiting for a bus for thirty minutes, and it passes you by. Without before warning, you may be late for work or an appointment. On top it, your fare may expire and you’ll have to pay again, so annoying!

The first time I took the TTC after almost a year, and hopped on a bus, I felt as though I was in a dream. The yellow social distance signs all over the seats…. Folks are literally NOT ALLOWED to sit directly beside you??!!Wow! You mean, I don’t have to deal with a stranger falling asleep on my shoulder? Sounds good to me! I don’t have to anticipate, how to politely ask a stranger, for some “space” to squeeze by them from the window seat. My personal space feels protected, the way that it should in public. I feel much more relaxed and enjoy the ride.The seat beside me will be free for my bags, and I have all the space that I need. Traveling on the TTC has been a pleasure, since these rules have been enforced. It’s one change for our new norm that I did not need to adapt to. I’m definitely used to it!

Take Care, Stay safe, and Stay tuned.

~Dawn Lovely

Follow me@:https://twitter.com/iamdawnlovely, https://t.co/wfctLWHJ1W

(Conclusion)It Would’ve Happened Regardless☹️…..

~ dawnlovely ~ Leave a comment

The news does always know the facts or post the facts. Social Media and “hear say” is where we usually get the real story when these situations occur. A social media post by family confirmed that the young man did not pass away. He is hospitalized and in critical condition. The conflict that caused the incident was unnecessary, and this is the BIGGEST problem with “us”. Apparently the suspect did not even know the victim, so it wasn’t personal.

My cousin and I had a discussion about this, as we reminisced about the time we were almost trampled in a crowd at Toronto beaches. Folks were terrified because they thought gunshots went off, but I later found out that it was actually over an altercation involving a bottle being thrown. The crowd was massive composed of Canadians and American visitors spanning across the beach sands. I only attended the festival to support my older sister who was a rap artist opening up for the famous acts. I’ll tell that story in another blog, but it was a very scary experience that changed my outlook on attending certain types of events.

Unfortunately, I am reluctant to be around the people who I am supposed to be comfortable around. I am not the only one who feels that way, and it’s a shame that I don’t think that it’s going to change.

Until next time, Good Night and Good sleep:)

Love&Respect,

Dawn Lovely

Follow me @:https://twitter.com/iamdawnlovely, https://t.co/wfctLWHJ1W

It Would’ve Happened Regardless😒…..

~ dawnlovely ~ 2 Comments

I didn’t want to write about this topic because it deeply upsets me for many reasons. I am tired of the senseless violence that erupts at what are supposed to be “fun” events. If you’re from Toronto, I’m sure you heard about the tragic stabbing at Woodbine mall in Rexdale.

The so-called “ghetto” area where a young man lost his life outside at a music event, actually looks like this:

I took the first two photos yesterday, and the day before yesterday. I wanted to show the yearly circus that they are setting up, and the way the parking lot usually looks on a regular day. The last photo is of a Cuban band that comes every year and performs fantastic live music inside of the mall. I always have a chat with them, as they are very friendly.

I reside near by, so I do the majority of my shopping there. The environment can be hectic and annoying at times, because this mall is famous for the indoor “Fantasy Fair”, Ontario’s largest amusement Park. The mall is usually packed with families and small children, and you will often hear kiddie show music as you enter. On a weekend there may even be a dog or magic show. There are (cultural)music festivals/concerts held inside and outside the mall every year. I have chosen not to attend any of the events/ concerts but I do enjoy the music from afar. I’m not one for large crowds, especially at music events. I have experienced being caught up in the typical chaos that tends to happen, a fight, a stabbing, or gunshots. It’s sad to say that I’m a pretty fearless person, but I do not trust these events because I know some in attendance are not there to have fun. There will always be the ones who come to find a person they have “beef” with or to simply cause trouble. This is the norm now and it is not normal to me. I had just walked home from the mall after doing a little shopping. Hours later I received that text and wasn’t that surprised. My friend texted me that there was a “shoot out” and “I will never. Ever. In my life do that s*** again.” I was very disappointed and literally shook my head. Ironically hours before, I had just had spoke with a few girls who were going to the festival. I asked them who was playing. They said that they did not know and we all laughed because none of us did. They said that they were just “going”, and I told them to have a good time as I walked away. I guarantee they did not expect a man to die.

I read about this online, and many blame the location of this year’s festival on the violence, which is absolutely absurd. I heard the story from my friend who witnessed the whole incident, and actually saw the young man injured and bleeding out. She said that security wasn’t very good, and this would’ve happened happened regardless of the location. I agree. SMH.

I will continue in my next blog.

Good Evening 🙂

Love&Respect,

Dawn Lovely

Follow me @:https://twitter.com/iamdawnlovely, https://t.co/wfctLWHJ1W

We Have What We Need(Part 2)…..

~ dawnlovely ~ Leave a comment

Last year I watched a few documentaries regarding the crisis in Venezuela. I was aware of what was going on over there, but seeing it was another story. Watching footage of the grocery stores empty, a low toilet paper supply was a big wake up call. Some of the people stated, “They never expected that it would come to this”. They were not expecting to have to leave their home, and live on the streets with their children. They didn’t expect to only have enough to feed their toddler once a day. Their access to the basics changed, items like milk, eggs and bread no longer available. Their environment became chaotic, and unlivable. At this point in time, for many, obtaining basic needs rules their daily existence.

We’ve all been guilty of taking our daily bread for granted. I grew up and have only lived in Toronto and the”GTA” so I am accustomed to certain standard of living. Whether you are penny pinching or thriving in this economy, you expect to wake up and be able to purchase the basics from your neighborhood corner store.

I am relieved every time I step out of the shower after a long day. My stress and troubles are eased away in addition to being clean. I couldn’t imagine not having that luxury, and I do not take it for granted. If tomorrow you woke up without access to clean running water, you would think about yesterday when you had that water. If you didn’t mop your floor or wash your dishes, you would be yearning for that water to flow from your faucet.

We have what we need to live, life is simpler once you realize that. We have what we need to live, so use what you have now to do what you’re supposed to do.

Have a safe and productive Saturday:)

Love&Respect,

~Dawn Lovely

Follow me @:https://twitter.com/iamdawnlovely, https://t.co/wfctLWHJ1W