I haven’t posted a blog in a few months…..I could have posted one last week, or even yesterday, but I was preoccupied dealing with my problems and worrying…Trying to come up with solutions to my problems, and contemplating how I allowed myself to get to this point…..I couldn’t post because I wasn’t in my writing vibe, I didn’t feel like “myself”……I couldn’t put a positive spin on how I felt, so kept it to myself…I didn’t want to be a “Debbie Downer”, otherwise, I would’ve wrote…..
I feel guilty for neglecting my blog, and all of my excuses haven’t helped me feel any better. The Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda’s, are a distraction, they NEVER help…They almost feel like an addiction. I eventually woke myself up from their trance, and I feel refreshed and renewed. I realized what I was doing to myself, what I’ve been doing to myself, looking back, instead of looking forward to what I CAN do…..
I can’t get back the time I wasted, or undue what’s already been done, I can’t go back and refuse the help that I chose to receive, but ended up putting me in a WORSE position….I was not in control of the unfortunate circumstance that ended up putting me out of my home, the place I thought I was going to build my business…..If you keep up with my blog, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. I’m working on conquering my vices the older I get, but I stumble sometimes and my fears creep up and I don’t always shoo them away…..Blaming myself for what I Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda did is a symptom of my fears and admitting that to myself was harder than sharing this blog with you.
Follow me @ :https://twitter.com/iamdawnlovely